I began to dig into my darkest thoughts to finally find the light
It was when I had nothing left that I finally made things right
With my back against the wall I forced my hand with a Trump card
When I averted my eyes from the path you took it as a disregard
I just had to be selfish a little while longer to get over my ego
Through introspection I will find the right way, te lo digo
Let me be Frank, I’m here just to do it my way
Trying to purse-you my passion and not a payday
Ignoring the mainstream battling the current trends
To comply with the road to success is to find a dead-end
Unlike anything I see on my screen, I do let the sun in
I took baby steps to success, now I am in the running
I want the recognition to show on my face like software
I want my abnegation to help those in need like welfare
Lines that get you high through your ears not your nose
Is all I aim to achieve as I lay my own thoughts in prose
A life without you I could never contemplate
An end to the heart I could not precipitate
Resignation to our fate has taken its toll
To never hear you smile has taken my soul
As I shall never rest my eyes on your wonder
I close them as my brain only begins to wander
Sister sister I see you walking up the street with your head down.
Sister sister is it me and my brother causing that unfortunate frown
Do you feel safe and sound when walking past the opposite gender
Is there value in the eyes of a patriarchy whose superiority is slender
Are we listening to your words as part of an equal conversation
Learning from our mistakes is proving to be a slow conversion
As our world fragments I fail to pick up the pieces
In a world of agony aunts I feel for the many nieces
Oppression and depression skew our common progress
Empathy and understanding is hard to muster in distress
Walk a thousand miles in my shoes to get deep in my soul
Resting on my sleeve, it was mine who’s heart she stole
Deflection of rejection should never be the way to cope
Acceptance of tolerance should be a heartbreak’s only scope
Did you think I would always remain?
Did I think I could withstand the pain?
Would I forever wait for you to return?
Put my life aside for this flame to burn?
Foolishly fly back to your arms like a dove?
I hate that the answer is yes to all of the above.
The only thing certain in this short life is death
That is why I pen this so I don’t waste my last breath
Are my actions in this world just cognitive behaviour
Does it explain the ills and thrills of my addictive behaviour
Do I blame it all on me personally or is it my ancestry
If I vow to change are these hollow as those of a monastery
Master of my own will or are those strings of a higher power
Reaching for god I quickly tumble down babel’s tower